This time around last year,  i can see myself busy of preparations. Uhmm. What kind of preparations am i talkin' about? Well, for my tour. This season has arrived again but i think, this time, it would become so much different. You know, last year, when this month comes, i used to go to malls to buy everything that my mom wants me to bring. I used to be so busy packing my luggage and stuffs like that. I used to call my mom and dad time to time just to check if everything was fine. And count the days left before my trip.

            It has been always like that for the past several years but right now, it seems that i'll not be doing them for now. Yes. I decided not to leave as early as they want me to go back on that place. They may find it so rude but honestly speaking, i still want to enjoy everything on THIS place where i am right now. I feel like i still have so much things to do and to know before i leave. That's what i feel...

            But then...

            Somewhere... just somewhere here inside me wants to go to the other side. I mean, yes. For the past several days until now, i've noticed that i'm crying whenever i wake up in the morning. I missed them... I missed them a lot.

            That place...

            Those people...

            I've been thinking about this lately... but then i find myself at a loss. I just couldn't think of the best way to do. Somewhere... just somewhere on that place calls me to go back.

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            The city is vivid and colorful. The people around me are restless. The sun shines brightly and the wind is cold. I found my hands inside my pockets. I looked forward and started to walk.

            "If i can just be with all the people i love at once, that would be the greatest thing that will ever happen" i thought.

            As i walk, the sky i see was just the same as of yesterdays'. I went on a subway and waited for the next train.

            The train arrives... and the door opened right infront of me.

            As i entered, my heart felt an unusual pain. -and made me think...

            "will i enter or not? this train comes once in a life time... If i don't, i will never go the place i ever want to be... but if i entered, i'll never be on this place once again..."

The Other Home I Have

            From a sleep, i opened my eyes as i feel that the car i was riding that time is moving ~moving so fast as if life really wanted it to be that way. Then, i put my eyes up to that wide and blue sky... Yes. It's summer. The season i've been waiting for has arrived. While thinking, i suddenlly remembered those unforgettable days i had with "them". It's not that i'm sad... but because those days were so much beautiful that i kept my tears from falling.

            The streets take life these days... The warm wind is now blowing and touching my skin... The scent i've been longing for is now around me... but unlike those years, somewhat, it seems so different right now...

            Painful...

            As if I am walking on a straight path that no one ever dares to cross. Yes. That's how courageous i am right now. Though my chest seems to burst in pain, i am proud that i've got to this place, no matter how hard i have endured. Beautiful things... are sometimes sad. They tend to leave you crying when their time is over. But i think that is life and that is what i really have to accept.

            Everytime i remember them, my tears will surely flow. Those unforgettable days ~i wish them to last forever. I want to be kept neat and beautiful inside my heart. I know and i'm really sure that i can't go back again to those days... but i'll be remembering them one by one inside my heart...

            The Unforgettable Days...

            Those unforgettable moments with them...

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            Hi there. Today is february 28, the last day of the month... and... yeah, the month will now end with this day. hahaha! 30 days from now, i'll be graduating. I'm kinda excited 'bout that (besides, my mom will go home just for that occasion) and i'm kinda nervous about the possible things that may happen after that. Well i'm preparing myself and yep. i've come up to a decision (That seems to be hard on my part as well). I shouldn't let the month of "April" pass without finding a job or else... sadly... i'll be going back to Japan on May.

            Hays.

            Well... i'm kinda nervous but you know, i'm serious 'bout that.

            OK... Ok... ok... these past few days, i've noticed that i am so "on the go!". Why? I think, i'm doing things on my own way right now. I mean, wtf? Will i ever have to do the things under someone else's decision? hahaha... So what? Then? Huh?

            Yes! Last thursday, i went to a mall with a friend. Just that thursday morning, i put insided this mind that i'll try new things as many as i could for that day. Yep! I did it... and it went pretty well...

            and... yesterday, we went to our classmate's house. GOD. Heaven knows how full i am when i got to our house... The moment we got on her house, we never stopped eating until we're about to go home (ofcourse, that's a hyperbolic cliche... nyahaha! ).

            That's why i didn't eat my dinner last time (which i don't really do these past few days).

            I losed weight, waistline and everything. I've spent tooo much money these days and i've waisted enough time these past few weeks. So, as this week and month ends, i would like to wish to myself to strive and work the hardest that i can be! Wooooooh! The last month of my student life... how i wish it'll last forever. ehe. anyways... gotta many things to do this day... ja!

            Last night, i had the time  to write the acknowledgments for my thesis. And surprizingly, i never expected that i'll be so emotional about writing it. As if... a part of me will soon to end... such kind of feeling really hurt me these past few days. I can now see myself crying and missing the life of being a students in the coming days. hayz....  Below is what i've written... and below, is what made me sad  since last night up to this very moment...

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ACKNOWLEGMENTS