Honestly speaking, i'm here at this point when i'm starting to realize the hard part of the work i recently had. Yes. I enjoy alot of it... but as time goes by, i guess, i'm starting to ask myself "Is this what i really like?". I mean, ever since i got hired at this work, my time... every single second... every other minute and every couple of hours that i have revolved around it... I guess that's one of the fact that i should accept. But right now, i just suddenly reallized that yes... this is a hard one for me.

            It's not that i'm not happy with this...

            It's just that i find myself too weak for this job. My time... yeah. to be frank, my bioligical clock here inside my body was already ruined. And yet, sometimes, i'm trying to pretend that everything is allright... and i'm hoping that i'll get used to it though sometime in the future.

            What will do?

            What will i need to accept this time?

            I missed a lot of things because this. As of now, i'm in a loss. That's what i feel right now... inside my mind, together with my beating heart.

            It's a total BLURRED vision.

            Perhaps, i'm just starting...but right now...

            MARK THIS DAY!

            i'm giving myself a month... for this job...

            and if it didn't sink on to me, i guess... i'll need to have a cross-over...

            That's it...

            A cross-over...

            Because as of now... i can't see things clearly within me...

            Those visions...

            they are just some messed up...BLURRED.

            Hurray Batch#10 for completing the 3-week training for MetroPCS! Hurray for me! Hurray for everyone who've been a part of this stage where i've learned so many things, experience many moments and met new and nice people. And now, i'm headed to the REAL BATTLE!!!

            This is what I am Sayin'! This is it... and this is the REAL one!

            Oh my GOD! 2 Days from now, i'll become a full forced customer care representative. Oh my GOD! I'm really really really really really really really nervous as of now... But anyway, i'm HOPING and PRAYING that everythinig will be alright when that moment arrives.

            I wonder how my first call would be?

            I wish for it to be recorded but i guess it's bare impossible. LOL.

            Well...

            How should i say this...

            As of now, i think i'm ready! Though there are some things which remain vague to me... but i'm pretty sure that they'll clear up as i experience the real working scenario.

            This is my first job!

            And this i promise...

            I'll give my best to do everything correctly.!

            Yey! This is what I am Sayin'!

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            It's 2:00 am. And i am awake...

            What!?????

            Yeah. That's true... and it has been like this for almost 3 weeks up to this very moment. And few minutes later, i'll be preparing myself for another (somewhat) busy day. ehehe... The truth is, i'm now working in a very good company in Clark. I can say that it IS a good company because i enjoy everything about it. Yes. this is how i feel right now... and i am hoping that it will continue until my last minute on that company.

            I am now a trainee of MetroPCS, an account in iQor (that's our company) which everything's revolve around cellular phones, plans, features, blah blah blah... i must admit... It is such a freakin' hard job especially for begginers such as ME! but.. yes, i honestly say that i enjoy it a lot...

            I met a bunch of interesting people... I had more confidence to myself that before. I guess, if things will continue like this forever, i could say that i can now live by myself... because that's what i've been always wanting for...

            to be independent...

            I could still remember those times when i'm still trying to get inside this company... and now, i couldn't believe it before my eyes... that i am at last working and experiencing meaningful things inside...

            As of now... i do miss a lot of people... that pain will never leave for awhile i think. But i must try harder and harder. I'm sure...

            My life had already changed a bit right now...

            But a part of ME would like to stay as it was before...

            This is My LIFE right now...

            the is my NEW life at this very moment...

            This morning, as i bid farewell to my mom, i pain a pinch of pain in my chest. Naturally... everytime i see her going back to Japan, i just want time to stop and do everything just to make her stay... It's been like this... for over 10 years up to now. I haven't got used to it though... i can frankly say that i'm still like a baby to her. I want it that way... even if i'll be very old someday, i want to be her only baby boy! hahaha. just kidding.

              What do i really want to do this time?

              That is one of the questions that linger in my mind these past few days. I graduated few days ago... but haven't finalized anything on my mind... Sometimes, i feel guilty about my decision of staying here in the philippines... as if, if i can only do everything just to pay them back (ofcourse  i want to even if they say it's their obligation...neh?), i would go immediately to Japan and search for job...

              This morning, as we leave our house, i recieved a text message... that i'm about to sign a contract with the company where i recently applied and got accepted.

             Yep~ This is it! i silently shouted to my mind... Perhaps... even if i missed my mom, my dad and those two "chikitings" a lot, i feel like i still want to stay here at this place and find my own... i want to prove that i can do good things for me and for the people around me. that's what i really want to do this time...

             The sky has been always the same...

             but i feel like i'm prepared to face the new sky above me...

            ~wish me luck (^_^)v

~to the new sky...